My four sisters - A festive Story


I usually begin with some philosophical material laced with a joke or two to break the ice, and then I tie my introduction to the main theme of my article so the reader can connect the two before I deliver the sermon/make a bit of sense. But since its #Nam December (new name for festive season) and most of you have weddings to crash, ceremonies to attend and generally things to do, I will just get straight to the point. 

I have four sisters, three belong to number 1 and one to number2 (Confused then read this one first (click, then read)). I call them the awesome four, personalities and moods swings that would make a plot of a martin Lawrence comedy. These girls have made my holiday interesting; shall we name them and shame them then? Okay, you ready?, set, let’s go.  I will use code names to avoid getting killed with a cooking spoon or a pair of heels. The oldest is P (as in the letter P, pronounced P-eeh), if her height is not intimidating enough her no nonsense approach will surely put enough fear in you to make your blood clot. The youngest M (pronounced e-e-m) thinks that P was abducted by aliens and then returned in her current state, which is way better than her other theory that her sister was switched at birth (told ya they make things interesting).

Stuck in the middle is E (pronounuced i-i-), level headed child of Jesus who asks more questions than a journalist, I was convinced she would be a lawyer only to be told that she wants to be a doctor. The funny thing about E is that she knows how to play her cards right, avoiding fights and generally staying out of the way and did I mention she has a shoe fetish?  She has a cupboard full but she wants more sneakers (i’m lost for an explanation). Just today we were watching a movie and a guy walks up to a girl and tells her “you have such a beautiful smile”, E turns to me and utters the phrase “Sies, they always say that! Like we don’t know that they use that on all the girls”, yep! I don’t have to worry about chasing away horny teenage boys from our house with this one.

Last but not least is Loo (pronounce low-h), she’s is from the philosophical school of thought, she is down to earth (even more humble than I am). However she is starting to annoy me with her growing passion for Manchester united and Wayne Rooney (the soccer player who looks worse than Shrek), but at least now I have an partner in the war for the DSTV remote with P, our alliance (me and Loo) means that P is now losing the war she has been winning for seven years.  This girl has jokes as well, one afternoon M was complaining about something (she does it a lot), so Loo chips in with “You know that you should really stop thinking that money grows on trees”, M was not pleased and the only reason sectarian violence did not break out was because P would have had a good go at them.

Luckily for me the holiday has only started, so there are still many more comedic moments in store from my four sisters (there! I got to the point in less than one page and only 573 words).
(lft-rght) E, M and Loo (P is too cool for pictures)

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