Why girls are absolutely mental


Time to talk about something important, nope not sex!! We will get to the birds and the bees later (Most of you know that stuff anyways). Let’s touch up on the stupefying marvels of genetic engineering that are GIRLS, chicks, shorties, cherries, uunona or whatever you call them. Never has anything besides calculus bamboozled my brain to such a magnitude that I felt that it would suddenly explode. 

They are dangerous things those girls, I swear they have the capability to induce boys/men to do the improbable. Their effect is spellbinding at times, they have been getting us into trouble for years, just look at the beginning of recorded history. Adam was a smart man, but Eve was smarter and a lot more curious, result: girl gets boy into trouble.


At times they are very sweet, caring, soft and vulnerable they then transform to absolutely bewildering in an instant, take feelings and emotions as a prime example. A girl can feel happy, conflicted, guilty and confused all at the same time. If a guy felt all those feelings at once, his head would explode. But it is not our fault that all normal men are built with the emotional range of a teaspoon. Give a girl a bouquet of lilies and she will feel happy, conflicted, guilty and confused. A boy will just feel very angry, for spending $40 on silly things that will die 3 days later.

If a girl ever catches you doing something naughty (Cheating on a test) she will go "you could get in trouble for that. You should always reply “i don’t know what you're talking about".  If at any moment you start feeling confused, happy, conflicted and guilty then you will get caught. 


They conduct an activity called shopping, waste of time and money. They spend hours trying on pairs of shoes and end up not buying any because none of them suit their skin complexion. Then there is the whole gossiping phenomenon, leave a group of women alone for just more than 60 seconds and the exchange of private information about individuals who are absent at the time will spark like a fire. I have firsthand experience with this from my several visits to the salon to get my dreadlocks retouched. Secrets are leaked and distributed faster than you can say “Guess what I heard?”



Yet why are boys drawn to girls? The answer is simple; an equally confounding phenomena called love. Love is not logical, it is chemical and that is what makes girls so mental. The female instinct (which is chemically fuelled, the brain releases a chemical that induces fear) is to protect and nature, because they are tasked with continuing the species. The same chemical reactions are absent in the male brain thus the male instinct is the opposite; destroy and conquer. Apart they are exact opposites, but when brought together they complement each other, the bad counteracts the good to produce a neutral result. Like fish and chips, Kapana and Windhoek Lager, Cheese and Wine.


Can’t live with them and we surely would not be able to live without them. [You are welcome to add information on why girls are mental in the comment box (girls included)).
 

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